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Excerpts from My Book!
(From the Table of Contents)
Motor Vehicle and AAMVA Related Stories
(From the Table of Contents)
Motor Vehicle and AAMVA Related Stories
- Buffy “How about a Boiled Egg?”
- My San Diego AAMVA Trip - “Never Travel with Two Women”
- Embarrassing Moments - “If they could see me now?”
- The Car Rental - “I have a reservation!”
- My St. Paul Hotel Experience (AAMVA Conference) - “Exceeding
Your Expectation” - My Omaha Hotel Experience (AAMVA Conference) - “The 5 a.m.
Wake-up Alarm!” - Working 9 to 5 - “Jokes Anyone?”
- Motor Vehicle Stories - “Say What?”
- Dealing with Other Managers - “The Step Child”
- My AAMVA Stories - “My Days as Committee Chair”
While You Do Your Business, Page 13
Buffy - “How About a Boiled Egg?”
This story is about a gal, let’s call her “Buffy,” who met every preconceived bias you may have of a “Buffy.” Buffy
was the only daughter of a wealthy businessman. He wanted his daughter to get some experience in the
workplace. Buffy was a very attractive blond who wanted to be a model. This was the first job she had. In fact, we
later learned that she had not experienced much in life.
On Buffy’s first day on the job, she brought in her modeling portfolio, which included several photos that at least
should have had an “R” rating. She proudly displayed her photos and asked several of us if we wanted one to
display on our desks. As a joke, I actually took one and put it on my desk. A few days later, I was kidding her and
implied that the boss was kind of hurt because she hadn’t asked him if he wanted a photo. The next day she came
to work all excited. She brought the boss a gift all wrapped up with a nice ribbon. You know what it was? It was a
picture of her in a nice frame. She proudly marched into the boss’ office and gave it to him. Let’s say we had a
big private laugh and the boss’ wife and kids didn’t appreciate it. ......
.....One day she had indicated that she was hungry and wanted to try something new during break. She asked
what type of food they had in our cafeteria. We told her a few of the items on the menu, including hard-boiled
eggs. Buffy and her father had a maid, who did all of the cooking, so Buffy had not had much experience in the
kitchen. She said that she had not had a hard-boiled egg before, and that their maid always cooked her eggs
scrambled. So with that, Buffy decided to go out on the limb and try something new.
After her break was over, we asked her if she liked the hard-boiled egg. Her reply was “No, not really. I thought it
was too crunchy!” We looked at each other with amazement. “Crunchy! Did you not peel the egg?” we asked.
Her response was “Was I suppose to peel it!”
*****************************************************************************************
My San Diego Trip - “Never Travel with Two Women”, Page 33-35
In 1999 I attended a conference for the American Association of Motor Vehicle Administrators in San Diego,
California. I had attended several conferences in the past, however, this time I was to travel with two ladies from
my office, Sherry Mansker and LeeAnn Sproul. Neither of the two ladies had been to San Diego before and I had
been there three times. I guess they saw me as an “expert” and they used and abused me as their personal tour
guide and chauffeur. We rented a car and I was the one that was asked to drive them all over San Diego after our
meetings in the afternoon and evening. Don’t you feel sorry for me?
Even though I was actually younger than the two gals, I kind of ended up as their guardian as well. I would try to
get them to go to their rooms at a reasonable hour so they could get up in the morning for our meetings.
However, each morning they were always on time, but they seemed extra tired. I could not figure this out, until one
night I caught them. I had dropped them off, after a drive, to go to their room. Like little school girls they waited
until I had gone down the hall to my room. I fooled them and went the other direction. They went to the lounge.
Their faces turned red when I walked into the lounge to see them sitting at a table drinking. I found out later that
they had been there the night before until the place closed at 3 a.m.
I am a non-smoker and can’t figure out those who smoke. And these two gals smoked cigarettes. Not only do they
smoke, but they have to have a specific brand and type of cigarettes. In my mind, a smoke is a smoke, but not for
these gals. One day I drove them all over San Diego hunting for a specific type of cigarettes. We finally found
them in a tobacco store 45 minutes later!
One evening Sherry and LeeAnn went out about town without an escort. (Yes, I got tired of being their
babysitter.) And yes, they got in trouble! They thought it would be fun to go on a horse and buggy ride. They
road for a few minutes when all of the sudden the horse started to act up. The horse jumped and then stopped
real fast, LeeAnn actually fell out of the carriage, and then the horse started running out of control. Sherry had
the scare of her life. When the driver got the horse to stop, Sherry yelled to the driver, “Get me out of here! This
is the worst damn buggy ride I ever had! And I’m not paying!” She then jumped out of the buggy and ran down the
street with the driver yelling, “You didn’t pay! You didn’t pay!”
When they finally told me this story, I spent the rest of the trip trying to avoid the police, in case the driver had
turned the ladies in.
When I finally made it back home to my wife, I was really glad to see her. I almost didn’t survive those five days in
San Diego! I told my wife about all the things that happened, and then I decided to play a joke on her. I told her
that I liked everything about my room, but I had a hard time trying to sleep because the ladies snored too loud. My
wife’s eyes almost popped out of her head. “You stayed in the same room!!” she yelled.
“No, just kidding.” She didn’t think that was funny.
MORE FUNNY STORIES ABOUT MY AAMVA EXPERIENCES IN THE BOOK!
Buffy - “How About a Boiled Egg?”
This story is about a gal, let’s call her “Buffy,” who met every preconceived bias you may have of a “Buffy.” Buffy
was the only daughter of a wealthy businessman. He wanted his daughter to get some experience in the
workplace. Buffy was a very attractive blond who wanted to be a model. This was the first job she had. In fact, we
later learned that she had not experienced much in life.
On Buffy’s first day on the job, she brought in her modeling portfolio, which included several photos that at least
should have had an “R” rating. She proudly displayed her photos and asked several of us if we wanted one to
display on our desks. As a joke, I actually took one and put it on my desk. A few days later, I was kidding her and
implied that the boss was kind of hurt because she hadn’t asked him if he wanted a photo. The next day she came
to work all excited. She brought the boss a gift all wrapped up with a nice ribbon. You know what it was? It was a
picture of her in a nice frame. She proudly marched into the boss’ office and gave it to him. Let’s say we had a
big private laugh and the boss’ wife and kids didn’t appreciate it. ......
.....One day she had indicated that she was hungry and wanted to try something new during break. She asked
what type of food they had in our cafeteria. We told her a few of the items on the menu, including hard-boiled
eggs. Buffy and her father had a maid, who did all of the cooking, so Buffy had not had much experience in the
kitchen. She said that she had not had a hard-boiled egg before, and that their maid always cooked her eggs
scrambled. So with that, Buffy decided to go out on the limb and try something new.
After her break was over, we asked her if she liked the hard-boiled egg. Her reply was “No, not really. I thought it
was too crunchy!” We looked at each other with amazement. “Crunchy! Did you not peel the egg?” we asked.
Her response was “Was I suppose to peel it!”
*****************************************************************************************
My San Diego Trip - “Never Travel with Two Women”, Page 33-35
In 1999 I attended a conference for the American Association of Motor Vehicle Administrators in San Diego,
California. I had attended several conferences in the past, however, this time I was to travel with two ladies from
my office, Sherry Mansker and LeeAnn Sproul. Neither of the two ladies had been to San Diego before and I had
been there three times. I guess they saw me as an “expert” and they used and abused me as their personal tour
guide and chauffeur. We rented a car and I was the one that was asked to drive them all over San Diego after our
meetings in the afternoon and evening. Don’t you feel sorry for me?
Even though I was actually younger than the two gals, I kind of ended up as their guardian as well. I would try to
get them to go to their rooms at a reasonable hour so they could get up in the morning for our meetings.
However, each morning they were always on time, but they seemed extra tired. I could not figure this out, until one
night I caught them. I had dropped them off, after a drive, to go to their room. Like little school girls they waited
until I had gone down the hall to my room. I fooled them and went the other direction. They went to the lounge.
Their faces turned red when I walked into the lounge to see them sitting at a table drinking. I found out later that
they had been there the night before until the place closed at 3 a.m.
I am a non-smoker and can’t figure out those who smoke. And these two gals smoked cigarettes. Not only do they
smoke, but they have to have a specific brand and type of cigarettes. In my mind, a smoke is a smoke, but not for
these gals. One day I drove them all over San Diego hunting for a specific type of cigarettes. We finally found
them in a tobacco store 45 minutes later!
One evening Sherry and LeeAnn went out about town without an escort. (Yes, I got tired of being their
babysitter.) And yes, they got in trouble! They thought it would be fun to go on a horse and buggy ride. They
road for a few minutes when all of the sudden the horse started to act up. The horse jumped and then stopped
real fast, LeeAnn actually fell out of the carriage, and then the horse started running out of control. Sherry had
the scare of her life. When the driver got the horse to stop, Sherry yelled to the driver, “Get me out of here! This
is the worst damn buggy ride I ever had! And I’m not paying!” She then jumped out of the buggy and ran down the
street with the driver yelling, “You didn’t pay! You didn’t pay!”
When they finally told me this story, I spent the rest of the trip trying to avoid the police, in case the driver had
turned the ladies in.
When I finally made it back home to my wife, I was really glad to see her. I almost didn’t survive those five days in
San Diego! I told my wife about all the things that happened, and then I decided to play a joke on her. I told her
that I liked everything about my room, but I had a hard time trying to sleep because the ladies snored too loud. My
wife’s eyes almost popped out of her head. “You stayed in the same room!!” she yelled.
“No, just kidding.” She didn’t think that was funny.
MORE FUNNY STORIES ABOUT MY AAMVA EXPERIENCES IN THE BOOK!
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